Changing Curly Hair Attitudes: 3 Ideas to Help You Love Your Curls

My mami once told me that I was born with tiny curls in my hair…and so, she tried to “brush them out” by brushing my hair numerous times a day. I don’t hold this against her. She simply repeated what was taught to her. You see, in our culture (as in many Caribbean cultures), a phenomenon of good hair vs bad hair exists. Those with manageable, finer hair have “good hair” while those with tighter curls tend to be described as having “bad hair.” It’s all ridiculous, really, but historical aspects of a culture take time to change.

My mom grew to love my curly hair and her own wavy hair, despite initially wishing to make my curls more manageable and brushing out the tighter curls. She now compliments my hair and my daughter’s, though there are rare moments when past attitudes toward curly hair still make an appearance. Loving curly hair tends to be a work-in-progress when you’ve been taught otherwise.

That is why we’ve made sure to always speak positively about curly hair, so that my daughter can love and appreciate her gorgeous curls. In the nine years since she was born, we’ve pointed out a variety of curly hair styles – in books, TV, and in women we see in our community. We also make sure to use positive, encouraging vocabulary to describe our curly hair. Instead of using words like crazy, messy, or manageable, we say beautiful, gorgeous, and healthy. I’d say our efforts are working. Baby girl loves her curls and was visibly hesitant about blow drying her hair straight in the two occasions we’ve done so. The girl has a better perception about curly hair than I ever did.

By modeling a love of curly hair – through wearing my own hair curly and through fostering a positive curly hair environment – we are helping change cultural attitudes and improve perceptions of curly hair. It’s great when these efforts are supported outside your home, especially in media your children consume. By seeing curly hair in books, on TV, and through advertising, children with curls see themselves reflected. Which is why I’m loving the Dove Hair #LoveYourCurls campaign. Dove’s efforts to encourage women and girls to celebrate their curls and inspire future generations to love them too is exactly what curly girls need.

Did you know that only 4 in 10 little girls with curly hair think it’s beautiful? And that only 10% of U.S. women with curly hair feel proud of their hair? (Stats from a recent study completed on behalf of Dove.) Ten percent. If we as women are not proud of our curly hair, then how can we encourage our daughters to love their own curly hair? While these statistics are eye-opening, I believe that with education, media campaigns such as Dove Hair’s Love Your Curls, and concerted efforts in our homes, we can help our beautiful curly girls feel good about their curls. Below you’ll find a couple of ideas to help you and your girls feel more confident with curly hair!

3 Ideas to Help You Love Your Curls

1. Properly care for your curly hair! I know that when I don’t stick to my hair care routine, I instantly start to look at my hair in a different light. Caring for curly hair takes a bit of work, yes, but as I always tell my daughter, “We need to take care of our hair just as we take care of our body and skin. It’s all part of being healthy and we want our hair to be healthy too.” Experiment with hair products to find those that work for you and your family. Try the new Dove Hair Quench Absolute product line, offering an ultra-nourishing shampoo and conditioner, as well as an intensive restoration hair mask and leave-in crème serum. The three-part hair system is all infused with protein and nutrients, to help provide your hair with more defined, natural curls.
2. Read books with curly hair characters. For children, especially, reading books with characters that have curly hair will be a treat. I remember many times that my baby girl would point to an illustration in a book and say, “She has hair like me!” Dove has created a beautiful Love Your Curls book, using real stories from real women to inspire wonderful poems, all about curly hair! The book is lovely and the poems are accompanied by fun watercolor illustrations. There’s even a poem in Spanish! The great thing is you can personalize and download a free e-book of Love Your Curls – complete with a special dedication and photo you upload. What a great way to help your curly hair girl appreciate her curls!
3. Get inspired by looking at photos of curly hair women. Sometimes my daughter and I search for curly hair photos online. It can be because we’re looking for new ways to style our hair, or perhaps we want a new haircut, or simply because we want to look at beautiful curls. All are inspiring and if you have young daughters, will help them see curly hair for what it is – beautiful!

I know that loving your curly hair doesn’t always come naturally, but I hope that with a shift in attitude, proper care, and ongoing support from society, you’ll come to embrace your curls. I’m sure you’ll see that loving your curly hair will help you gain confidence, and in turn, will help your children feel greater love for their own curls.

How do you feel about your curly hair? What other ideas can you share that help you love your curls?

All photos © Melanie Edwards/modernmami™

Disclosure: This post is part of the Dove Love Your Curls blogger program by The Motherhood, who compensated me for my time and the development of this content. All thoughts, opinions, experiences, and photos shared are my own.